Recommended Resources

Hi, I'm Joe Tippetts. After being raised in the church, I found myself in a disorienting faith crisis in my mid-30s. I went from enthusiastic involvement to inactivity to resigning. Then, quite unexpectedly, choosing to get re-baptized in April 2019.

More about the motives behind this research...

Since returning, I've often felt a large gap of misunderstanding, fear, and distrust between "traditional" believing members and those who may question, interpret our faith differently, doubt, or leave.

When I was recently invited to be a ward missionary, I pored over the handbook, our ward mission plan, related conference talks, and scriptures pertaining to my calling. The way we think, speak, and act in relation to those who leave and those outside of our church often undermines our own stated values of love, kindness, respecting agency, and recognizing the innate worth of every person.

The current notion of a "missionary opportunity" involves telling, sharing, and trying to persuade others to value our beliefs.

I believe this is more about cultural habits and traditions than doctrinal teachings. I believe the powerful idea of an ongoing restoration gives us space to question our current methods and mindsets so we can constantly improve.

Soon, I hope "missionary opportunity" and "ministering" can come to be understood as chances to listen, understand, and care about the views and experiences of others long before we consider whether invitations are appropriate. I hope we can think of "success" in terms of quality relationships over conversions and reactivations.

People with this kind of relationship naturally talk about cherished beliefs in intimate and uplifting ways.

This new kind of "missionary opportunity" was my hope when I created this survey.

As you read, I hope you find insights that will lead you to more understanding, empathy, and genuine friendships with people, regardless of their current beliefs or relationship with our church.

With that said, here are some resources that I've found useful, both as a former and current member.

April 2021 Liahona

Link

The digital version of the April 2021 Liahona includes six fantastic articles on better relating with people who doubt, stop believing, or leave the church.

Bridges: Ministering to Those Who Question

Link to Kindle, audio, or printed version (also available at Deseret Book)

By a long shot, this is my favorite book on the subject. David Ostler shows great insight, empathy, and practical suggestions.

As I read it, thinking back on my years outside of the church, this book nailed it. I wish it had been written 10 years earlier.

Other books worth mentioning:

Planted - Patrick Mason
Navigating a Mormon Faith Crisis - Thomas Wirthlin McConkie
The Crucible of Doubt - Terryl Givens
Faith is Not Blind - Bruce C. Hafen

Uplift Community of Faith

Link

Uplift is a private Facebook group that seeks to support people who are dealing with faith challenges or are trying to understanding and support loved ones.

It's led by a group of moderators who work to keep a faith-firming tone. All posts require approval by moderators who actively participate in discussions in a way that promotes faith.

They've also created videos, blog posts, and events to provide support. Some are very good at personally connecting with people as one-on-one ministers.

Recommended for people who want to stay positively engaged with the church despite being in non-traditional situations or experiencing doubts.

Understanding Mormon Disbelief

Link

An extensive research project led by Greg Prince, John Dehlin, and Travis Stratford. It includes detailed insights and recommendations. Shared with top church leaders, this study influenced the Church's development of the Gospel Topic Essays.

Open Stories Foundation / John Dehlin

Link

For many years, John Dehlin has led the Open Stories Foundation. This is an umbrella organization that sponsors various faith-themed podcasts, support groups, retreats, mental health resources, conferences, etc.

Recommended for people who want access to resources and support that isn't overtly trying to keep them in the church. Many of the discussions and conversations may feel disrespectful or negative to active, believing members.

The Missing Resource - Ward or Stake Level Support Groups?

People look elsewhere for support when they don't find it with their families, local wards, and stakes.

We may believe we already have such resources. If people don't feel safe using them, then we really don't.

If people don't feel like leaders understand, they'll go elsewhere. If people believe that openly sharing their experience may result in judgement, church discipline, uninformed responses, social awkwardness, or trite recipes for dealing with it, they'll go elsewhere.

They already have gone elsewhere. So many who grew up in our church, served missions, married in the temple, and loved it for years have left. They've gone where they can express themselves openly and feel understood, even if its by online people they've never met.

Every ward or stake has people who are well acquainted with these issues and still choose to be active members. Will we use them? Will we act or be acted upon? Will we be anxiously engaged or bury our talent to avoid losing more than we've already lost?

I hope we can have the courage to act! As the 1993 Missionary Guide taught many of us to ask, "Will you?"